hurricane-emily: jimgaffigan: Ladies I hope getting your nails done feels good because not a single man notices you got them done. maybe just maybe women do some things for themselves and not just for men what a concept
When you insult someone and they're right there
Dads leave. No need to be a pussy about it. -Tony Stark Funny how much this...
floozys: “boys will be bo-“ *flies in* *punches you in the face* bOYS WILL BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS LIKE EVERYONE ELSE
b-nksy: I think taylor swift should walk in while kim kardashian is in labor and say “hey kanye i know you’re having a baby and all, but i just wanted to say that beyonce had the best baby of all time
loveforeversmilealways: arlene13: why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a registered six offender i am legit in tears over this joke
i'm so glad i met you
valiantdefenderoftheearth: #BECAUSE THEY’RE TRAPPED AND SURROUNDED BY DANGER #BUT THEY TAKE A MINUTE AND THEY SMILE #BECAUSE THEY’RE JUST SO GLAD THEY MET EACH OTHER <3
thepyrolizard: imagine-the-unimaginative: thepyrolizard: SO, Harry Potter and the order of the phoenix, right? I guess that’s when the books started getting dead sirius Get the fuck out don’t worry, I have a lot more bellatrix up my sleeve
90sjamz: Supernova Girl | From Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century Tempted to reblog this twice….this shit was my jam
NEW PRIMARY FOCUS: 1. GET A FULL TIME JOB THAT’S NOT RETAIL. 2. SAVE $. EVERY FUCKING DIME I CAN. 3. GET A NEW APARTMENT. 4. BE A GOD DAMN ADULT, FINALLY.
All of my childhood nightmares have come to fruition……..fuck
senpai-has-noticed-you: sometimes i think i’m arrogant but then i remember that julius caesar was kidnapped by cicilian pirates and when they demanded a ransom of 620 kgs of silver he got mad because he thought he was worth more than that and made them raise it to 1550 kg